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In Self-Help , a collection of stories by Lorrie Moore, page 117 to be exact, lies a short story titled How to Become a Writer . It begins with my favorite published sentence to date: "First, try to be something, anything, else." I first read it while attending a community college for a video production degree. I was questioning my choices as a future producer and wanted to dip my toes into a much more profitable English Degree. The class was ENGL-1040 and covered short stories and the authors that created them. Within the first paragraph, the narrator lays out that "it is best if you fail at an early age." I was 22 at the time and a year away from reaching late-stage Gifted Child Burnout. To hear that writers need to be okay with failure was a foreign and loathsome thought. I hated how it seemed that it was out of a writer's hands to protect themselves from failure. I passed the english class with a 99% — which really pissed me off — and went forward with my courses for video production because I abide by the sunk-cost bias. I worked multiple jobs (sometimes three at a time) to pay for my classes. I wasn't picky: chocolatier, home heath insurance recruiter, keyholder at a clothing boutique, nanny, lighting and rig technician, keyholder at another clothing store, and a church secretary. I secretly liked any of these jobs more than I liked producing videos for other people. I never stopped writing in my journals. I graduated a year and a half later. By then, I had started my own freelance graphic design company to pay for college classes. This was what I wanted to do. I was blessed that it only took two months for me to find a job as a graphic designer. The Gifted Child Syndrome was buzzing with a perfect gig and the bubbles of impending collapse. I continued to write in my journals, but this time it wasn't about me, it was about these (fictional) characters that were yelling stories at me. The 1999 single What's My Age Again? by blink-182 thrice states, "Nobody likes you when you're twenty-three." Frankly, I didn't like me, either. The Gifted Child bubble had popped. I was going through some traumatic shit that took a therapist to unpack. If you knew me back then, no you didn't, but I'm still super, super sorry about it. I was doing one of those miserable deep cleans of my room because I needed to make more room for a shelf to put all my filled journals. I laughed when I opened a closet box to see several college books inside, specifically Self-Help . I read How to Become a Writer again. It wasn't lovely to see my life paralleling with the narrator — "Decide to experiment with fiction...Take all the babysitting jobs you can get...spend too much time slouched and demoralized...Perhaps you are losing your pals, your acquaintances..." — but it was comforting. I continued to work as a graphic designer at a print house for three years. I continued to write in my journals. The characters now had storylines and intertwining plots. I think I was telling people that I was moonlighting as a writer at this time. I wasn't ready to claim it but I was ready to hold onto the idea. When the pandemic happened, I had too much time on my hands so I read what books I had at home. Like a purple and white beacon, Self-Help brought my mind to safe harbor. How to Become a Writer had the magic phrase needed to propel me out of a pity party and into finalizing a manuscript that was reaching it's seventh anniversary from conception: "You are said to be self-mutilating and losing weight, but you continue writing. The only happiness you have is writing something new, in the middle of the night, armpits damp, heart pounding, something no one has yet seen. You have only those brief, fragile, untested moments of exhilaration when you know: you are a genius. Understand what you must do." I finished my first manuscript by the time the quarantine was over. The world had changed. I had changed. But I hid the manuscript and took a job as a landscaper. I was laid off in September because of Covid restrictions. The job market was tough then. Gifted Child me would have been an anxious wreck. I had reached the point in therapy where I could give myself grace. The universe gave me some grace when I read How to Become a Writer again. "You must write from what you know, from what has happened to you." I began writing my second manuscript in that time. I also began writing my third because I still had a little Gifted Child in me that needed sating. I got a job as a jeweler because I'm not picky. Loved the technical work, hated the work culture. I quit and started a dogsitting business. Loved that more than anything I had done before. I'm not shy to say that it's because I had more contact with dogs than humans. I finished my second and third manuscript. I dared to call it a series and talk to my friends about it. Just as it's written in How to Become a Writer: "Sooner or later you have a finished manuscript more or less. People look at it in a vaguely troubled sort of way and say, 'I'll bet becoming a writer was always a fantasy of yours, wasn't it?'...Say that of all the fantasies possible in the world, you can't imagine being a writer even making the top twenty." But I kept writing in my journals and brainstorming a fourth story. I started putting "Writer/Dogsitter" in my bio on dating apps. It was a new me that I wanted to show of to the world, so I might as well be authentic about what I was doing. The emotionally unavailable men I continued to date, "with a face blank as a sheet of paper asks you whether writers often become discouraged. Say that sometimes they do and sometimes they do...'Interesting,' smiles your date, and then he looks down at his arm hairs and starts to smooth them, all, always, in the same direction." Spoiler alert: that's how it ends. With the Narrator's dates acting the same way that my dates do. I'm not shy to say that I cried upon realizing I've finally reached a milestone. The story doesn't end with the narrator becoming a successful writer and this story is the opposite of an instruction manual. The story ends with the narrator in a state of understanding of "this is how it is" as a writer. Now, after what's been eight — soon to be nine years later and with five manuscripts — I dare call them a series — under my belt, I read How to Become a Writer before writing this post, and I see myself through the entirety of the story. I feel I'm finally understanding that I became a writer when I took on all aspects — discouragement, exhilaration, misunderstandings, loss, obsession, etc., etc., etc. I was finally okay with failure as it had become a familiar and assuring thought. And so; while I've done my best to be anything but a writer, it's only ever confirmed that a writer is exactly who I should be. Cheers, Katherine Arkady P.S. If Lorrie Moore is reading this right now: you're the reason my video production degree is somewhere in my mother's attic. ❤️

Introduction In Part Two of this conversation, we go deeper . This isn’t just about being in a band—it’s about what it means to live a creative life, with all the messy, beautiful, chaotic parts that come with it. Katherine picks things back up with Dave, a guitarist who’s been in more bands than most of us have friend groups, and together they unpack everything from the personalities you run into in the music world, to what it feels like to carry gear, lead rehearsals, and maybe even walk away from something you once loved. As a writer, this episode hit differently. It’s less about music and more about rhythm—the kind we try to find in our work, in our relationships, and in the way we build a life around our passions. If you’ve ever tried to create something with other people, struggled to find your voice in a group, or wondered if you’ll always  love the thing you’re building… this one’s for you. Also, yes: we talk about the underrated bands you should  be listening to. You're welcome. Let’s hang. Here's the link to this specific podcast episode on my website.  Listen to the podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and all other major platforms! Timestamps 00:00:44 What sort of personality types do you notice, do you come across? 00:03:17 What are private gigs like? 00:04:17 On a what? 00:04:56 What is it like hauling equipment? 00:09:28 So what is a physical item that you cherish and with everything having to do with playing in a band? 00:09:37 What is one item if something were to be burning and you had to go in and run and get one thing? 00:14:18 So when reading books and journals and watching MTV and just getting all of this information, there's bound to be out of date tools or terminology. 00:14:32 As far as playing in a band or learning more about music, how much change have you seen over the years? 00:14:39 Are there terms that used to be used or tools that are just kind of now just really nice paperweights? 00:21:12 Do you like taking in full albums? 00:21:18 What is it for the people that don't really do that anymore? 00:21:21 What are they missing out on? 00:25:01 What kind of legalities might be involved with this sort of thing? 00:26:56 Tell me about tryouts 00:32:38 How does one quit a band? 00:33:45 So we talked about having friends with a band, around a band, knowing creatives. How is it like dating in that aspect? 00:34:08 Is there a certain balancing act that one must do? 00:38:30 Are there people that follow the band just because? 00:40:17 How do you communicate with your band members during a show? 00:44:32 Murphy's law states that anything that can go wrong will go wrong. What is something that is perhaps often overlooked or forgotten before you start playing, where it takes the entire band to say, Don't forget that 00:47:34 How do you book a gig? 00:53:04 How long is the typical set for you? 01:00:19 If you were to buy a piece of equipment right now, splurge, what's something that you want to splurge on right now? 01:05:31 I guess what I'm asking is, if it's the standard, if it's what everybody's getting, is that necessarily a good thing? 01:11:14 What's a band that you think is underrated that you cannot love more, that everybody needs to listen to? 01:13:51 How you find more information in this, is just being involved with it. 01:15:21 If somebody wasn't in this field, if somebody had never played in a band, never experienced what you or, you know, the somewhat general population of people that have played in a band, if somebody wasn't in this field, they would never believe what? 01:19:41 Do you think you'll always have this passion? Key Takeaways: There’s a whole social ecosystem inside a band. Personality types matter. Communication matters. You can feel  it when someone’s not vibing, even mid-song. And like in any group dynamic, especially creative ones, learning how to navigate people is just as important as learning your instrument. Equipment is heavy. Emotionally and  physically. From hauling gear to choosing that one cherished piece you’d run into a burning building for, equipment isn't just tools. It’s identity, memory, comfort. There’s a weight to it all, literally and metaphorically. Creativity and culture evolve—and so do musicians Dave reflects on how much has changed over the years: gear, language, listening habits. As creatives, we’re always adapting. The tools might shift, but the core—expression, connection, joy—all stays the same. Breakups happen in bands, too From quitting a band, losing a gig, or even navigating dating in a music-heavy life, there’s a lot of emotional navigation that goes on behind the scenes. These are real relationships with real stakes. Passion doesn’t fade—it just deepens That final question hits hard: Do you think you'll always have this passion?  For anyone who’s pursued a creative life, this is the question that lingers. Dave’s answer? It’s clear that when you build your life around what you love, the passion might change forms, but it never really goes away. Editor's Note: As a writer, I’m always looking for stories that blur the line between everyday life and something bigger. This conversation delivers exactly that. Where Part One gave us the foundations of playing in a band, Part Two digs into what happens when the lifestyle takes root in your identity. From gear fails to gig wins, to the quiet heartbreak of quitting a band or the vulnerability of being seen  by people who truly understand what you're about — this episode is less about music and more about being human in creative spaces. What stood out to me most? The emotional honesty. Dave doesn’t just talk about playing music, he talks about the life around  it. The relationships, the community, the internal dialogue every artist knows: Am I doing this right? Do I still love this? Will I always love this? This one’s for the creatives who know that passion isn't always glamorous, but it's always worth it. Links & Resources: Check out Jackson and the Poolsharks  on their website , Spotify , Apple Music , and Instagram . Listen to Part One from the "Playing in a Band" series here . Passion doesn't fade, it just deepens, Katherine Arkady

My favorite job to this day is being a dogsitter and I'm not too shy to say that it's because I had more contact with dogs than humans. A favorite storyline of mine is in my second manuscript. It's about a girl, Reagan, who runs a dogsitting business in her town so she can get paid to couch surf and avoid her home life. Takes one to write one, so I got to the hard work of hanging out with dogs. And dogs are where it's at. I would throw a frisbee with a weimeraner, sing with Huskies, snuggle with a terrier mix, explore a huge backyard with two English Labs, learn how to hide pills from a Chihuahua very  well, and have regular sleepovers with a Dalmation-Pitbull mix that was a gentleman and a scholar. I could make my own schedule and charge whatever rate I wanted and I was paid handsomely  to play with the dogs. I was happy to offer premier care in medication administration, senior dog knowledge, and the eagle-eye of finding and removing sneaky ticks. Imagine going to work knowing that every dog that saw you was going to be bonkers excited to see you. It was a great boost in self-esteem. And a great writing exercise too! I created little short stories to summarize my visits with the dogs and text them over to their humans: Gracie:     We started off with what I like to call a “smell download.” Gracie got to smell the Dalmatian, pitties, labs, and Shih Tzu I saw today.     Then, when it was time to play, Gracie pointed out that my throw could use some practice. She very graciously brought back the ball every time. She sees no improvement but has hope for me yet. Gracie moved onto something more my speed: the yellow frisbee. She doesn’t go easy on me. Good coaches don’t. Olive:     When Olive sees me now, she sees a frisbee in her future. No hi’s, no how are ya’s, just leading to the back door-wall to start the fun lol     We worked on her frisbee etiquette as far as barking to get me to throw the frisbee. She caught on quickly to wait quietly and we had a ball of a time. Olive was keen to my fakeouts and caught the frisbee nearly every time. We took a water break inside so she could catch her breath. The second round of frisbee was just as fun with a patio cool down to close out our time. Winston:     Winston has been very diligent in making sure I take breaks on this mini writer’s retreat of mine. This break was a walk! The sun finally showed up for it too! A dog, or a large cat, has been pooping along the sidewalks up and down the street. I’m sure some neighbor’s aren’t happy about that but Winston was geeked. It was like a scavenger hunt, he was even drooling. 😅 Outside of that he was very peppy and had lots to smell. He said hi to your birdwatching neighbor but was more interested in other poo lying around. Dogs lol Bo and Bomber:     There was a break in the rain so we started our visit off with a casual stroll in the drizzle. Bushes were smelled and flowers were watered (just to be sure). When the rain picked up, we headed into the garage. The monkey was fun to play tug with until Bo performed a mandibular osteotomy on his face. The monkey was sent to the infirmary (laundry room) for tests. We played with a tennis ball instead. Bomber was his best cheerleader.     Then, he focused on setting up for a sit-in. I wasn’t expecting one with the rain, but Bomber has plans for every situation. He planted himself at the opening of the garage and made himself comfy. I asked him if he wasn’t getting enough treats or pets. He just looked outside at the rain. Perhaps Bo was offering sage advice that we should all stop and watch the rain sometimes. Perhaps he was giving me the silent treatment until I gave him a treat. Back inside, he quickly laid back down. Philosophizing sure tires him out. The visits kept me on my toes with being aware of what was going on, how to get the plot of the visit summary to flow, and how to properly portray the many personalities of Dog™. The dogs were always excellent writing partners. Pups that I stayed overnight with didn't mind my weird writing hours. They were always more than happy to rot on the couch with me while I binged the movies and documentaries I used for story research. I tossed a ball with a golden retriever over and over and over (and over and over) again while working out my writer's block. I was regularly reminded by the canines that I needed to take a healthy break from looking at a screen and go for a walk with them. Dogs are as dedicated to your writing as you are! So, in closing, after two and a half years of research, I conclude that if one hangs out with more dogs, the likelihood of improving your writing increases.* Say hi to your dog for me, Katherine Arkady *This statement is not to be used as a bargaining tool to your partner that you should get another dog. Don't put me in the middle of this ❤️

In my third manuscript, I wrote a chapter about two of my characters visiting the Art Institute of Chicago for a date. They have a great time. They split a weed edible. Artwork began to breathe. Hands are held. They have a great time. How could I write about a date at the Art Institute of Chicago when I had been there once, three years prior, for a total of two hours? Do I have gigs of recorded video? Do I have journals filled with details? Do I have a photographic memory or hyperthymesia? No. But I do have access to the internet! From the comfort of my kitchen counter, I could take a point-and-click stroll through the Art Institute of Chicago via Google Maps Street View: https://tinyurl.com/AICGoogleStreetView  (It's shortened because the google url is several lines long and I didn't want to do that to you.) I took a journey. I felt the environment of carefully arranged lighting and carefully curated art. With this resource, I was able to gain environmental perspective of the character's experience. Notes written include but aren't limited to: couples would probably like to view pieces in the smaller alcoves so they can stand closer to one another. wide, almost square hallways instead of doors to let the big pieces through soft lighting everywhere, nearly dreamy spotlights on the pieces Items in the Gift Shop Ideal for a Stoner Experience Music boxes that plucked metal tines, sparkly out-there necklaces, art clocks that...probably tell time, books about architecture including but not limited to "stone," "concrete," and "brick." "Imagine waking up one day, hammering rusty nails into wood, and selling it for millions" "Is that how it works?" "I don't know. (Art dealer friend) would have a lot to say about it." While the spotlights existed to put the best light on the pieces of art, they did no justice for the walls. Like a burden, the shadow cast by the frames dumped blocks of harsh, then diffused, then barely there shadows onto the walls. The painted lilac walls looked like rancid wine under the shadows. "What do you think a frame like this would go for?" Theo pointed at a thick one with ornate filigrees. "Maybe find something nice for my uh--" He chuckled. "--kitchen." "I'd say at least $100 for every century so...$500?" "Oh we ought to go got something more economical in the 18th century." Was the painting still "generously on loan" if the loaner was getting a massive tax break? Bonus of bonuses, I got recommendations in Google Reviews of what pieces to check out! Now, copyright laws and all that come into play when some pieces of art have been blurred away from view. I get it. There are limits to the internet. However, the museum itself has a website sharp with details. Check out their online collection here: https://www.artic.edu/collection Because of this resource, I was able to get detailed information about the pieces I ended up spotlighting in my manuscript: The Bewitched Mill Reference Number: 1931.522 Copyright: Public Domain Date: 1913 Artist: Franz Marc German, 1880–1916 https://www.artic.edu/artworks/9021/the-bewitched-mill     "Among the German Expressionists, artists who used strong color and exaggerated form to express emotional content, Franz Marc was unique in his empathic interest in the life of animals. “Is there a more mysterious idea,” he asked, “than to imagine how nature is reflected in the eyes of animals?” Beginning in 1905, he devoted himself to representing the world with a fresh and purifying vision. Marc painted The Bewitched Mill following a sojourn to the Italian town of Merano in the southern Tirol. The work’s title refers to the “magical” harmony he sensed there between human life, represented by the houses and mill on the left, and nature, embodied by the lyrical region of trees and animals on the right." Sky above Clouds IV Reference Number: 1983.821 Copyright: © The Art Institute of Chicago Date: 1965 Artist: Georgia O’Keeffe American, 1887–1986 https://www.artic.edu/artworks/100858/sky-above-clouds-iv     "Painted in the summer of 1965, when Georgia O’Keeffe was 77 years old, this monumental work culminates a series inspired by the artist’s experiences as an airplane passenger during the 1950s. Working in Abiquiu, New Mexico, O’Keeffe began around 1963 to capture the endless expanses of clouds she had observed from airplane windows during trips all over the world. Beginning with a relatively realistic depiction of small white clouds on a three-by-four-foot canvas, she progressed to more stylized images of the motif on larger surfaces. O’Keeffe wrote:     'I painted a painting eight feet high and twenty-four feet wide—it kept me working every minute from six a.m. till eight or nine at night as I had to be finished before it was cold—I worked in the garage and it had no heat—Such a size is of course ridiculous but I had it in my head as something I wanted to do for a couple of years.'     In 1970 Sky above Clouds IV  was scheduled to be included in a retrospective of O’Keeffe’s work at the Whitney Museum of American Art, New York, the Art Institute of Chicago, and the San Francisco Museum of Art. After being shown in New York and Chicago, the painting was determined to be too large to enter the doors of the museum in San Francisco. It thus remained on loan to the Art Institute for more than a decade, while the artist and public-minded collectors of her art arranged for it to join the museum’s permanent collection.     The special relationship between O’Keeffe and the Art Institute began in 1905, when she enrolled as a student at the School of the Art Institute. Her first museum retrospective was organized here in 1943. Later, as the executor for the estate of her husband, the pioneering American photographer and art dealer Alfred Stieglitz, O’Keeffe presented the Art Institute with an important group of modernist works, including a number of her own, many of which are on view in the galleries of American art. She continued to make significant additions to this bequest until her death, at age 98, in 1986." Nighthawks Reference Number: 1942.51 Copyright: Friends of American Art Collection Date: 1942 Artist: Edward Hopper American, 1882–1967 https://www.artic.edu/artworks/111628/nighthawks "About Nighthawks  Edward Hopper recollected, “unconsciously, probably, I was painting the loneliness of a large city.” In an all-night diner, three customers sit at the counter opposite a server, each appear to be lost in thought and disengaged from one another. The composition is tightly organized and spare in details: there is no entrance to the establishment, no debris on the streets. Through harmonious geometric forms and the glow of the diner’s electric lighting, Hopper created a serene, beautiful, yet enigmatic scene. Although inspired by a restaurant Hopper had seen on Greenwich Avenue in New York, the painting is not a realistic transcription of an actual place. As viewers, we are left to wonder about the figures, their relationships, and this imagined world." Movements Reference Number: 1949.544 Copyright: Public Domain but Credited to Alfred Stieglitz Collection Date: 1913 Artist: Marsden Hartley American, 1877–1943 https://www.artic.edu/artworks/65916/movements "Unlike many other American artists, Marsden Hartley was more drawn to German Expressionism than to French modernism, and executed this painting in Berlin. Made on the eve of World War I, Movements  possesses a turbulent energy that sparks associations with both the vibrancy of modern Berlin and movements of music. Like the Russian Expressionist painter Vasily Kandinsky, Hartley sought to make his work more like music, which he admired for its non-narrative nature and its potential to be purely spiritual or separate from material reality." So maybe it doesn't take a trip to the AIC to write about it, it just takes an internet connection. If you want to know more about the date at the Art Institute of Chicago, it's in my third manuscript. Use the internet's powers for good, Katherine Arkady

I have great woe for my stories that may have been. The ideas that were conceived right before sleeping where I was convinced that I'd remember it in the morning. The plot hole filler that occurred to me while I was waiting in the grocery checkout line. The funny quip that will never again be qupped because I told myself that I'd remember to write it down after finishing an episode of Ted Lasso . Your phone is attached to you. Mine is to me. Pull that super computer out of your pocket and text that idea to yourself right away.   I know, I know: you have a notes app already. I do too, friend. My favorite   app and website to handle notes and chapters is Evernote. * They make it really simple and quick to jot down a thought and stay overly organized with chapter work. But alas, my easily distractible brain will get sidetracked while thumbing through my phone. A text is quicker for my prefrontal cortex. Hell, I can hop right into a voice message for myself. Then, I can quickly get back to what I was doing, and the text is easily copiable to other apps later on. Maybe this will help you out. Maybe you have a method you could recommend to me. I'm all ears! But, whatever you do, take my conclusion after many years of researching this fallacy: record it.  You won't remember it later. Readers want their flabbers to be gasted when it comes to the storytelling. They want their socks knocked off with the emotions your characters invoke. Readers need  to be altered by a mere sentence of yours that sums up their entire struggle with something in a way that they finally feel set free. So you have to remember these ideas. Record them. In a pinch, use eyeliner on an ankle to remember a plot hole filler, Katherine Arkady *not sponsored. But people of Evernote, if you're reading this... 👀 👀

I put a temporary ban on peanut butter recipes in my childhood household. My mother was a contest baker and had worked on a potential winning recipe for a peanut butter-based baked good for the better part of two months. Peanut butter blondies, fluffernutter cookies, peanut butter and jelly cookies, peanut butter bread, and even peanut butter cookies stuffed with peanut butter balls. When Mom finally submitted the recipe to Betty Crocker , I, as the oldest daughter, decreed there would be no more peanut butter for a few months. I couldn't take it. I broke my own rule with the request of her winning recipe the day it was published in Betty Crocker Magazine  that mom was a finalist for her no-bake peanut butter krispie cookies. Baked goods had always been a staple at my house. Mom, a stay at home mother at the time, usually had oatmeal raisin cookies or apple crisp freshly baked for my sister and I. She made our birthday cakes every year and competed with decorating as a hobby. There was a span of five or six years when she was cooking anything and everything for any and every food contest out there. We got boxes of cereal for her contributions to General Mills . She placed in a recipe competition for Annie Chun  and were sent the fixings for several dinners made from their boxed and prepared goods. I still have the several sets of fancy chop sticks they sent. Mom submitted to many a contest and achieved high marks in many; more baked goods than any. If you were to ask me where my idea for a bakery setting came from, it was my mother. I learned what it took to make a perfect baked good--sometimes even award winning. To me, that's what mattered for a successful bakery. While brainstorming my first manuscript, I didn't concern myself with the business aspect of a bakery so much as the importance of a bakery in a community. I learned early on that neighbors loved being taste testers and wanted to share with their neighbors and so on. Their baked goods brought community and culture to a town. If the sweets were good, the good financials would follow--or, at the very least, a good storyline would follow. What similarities does the bakery in my first manuscript have to my reality? My favorite treat is lemon meringue cookies and are showcased as such by characters Charlotte and Oliver. The labor of love my mother cultivated in her home kitchen translates into the work ethic of Charlotte and her brother Thomas running Liberty's Bakery.* Through my mother's baking competition budgets, I learned how to be financially literate enough to write about a real bakery's finances. Writing this first manuscript about saving a bakery was my first foray into writing a serious piece. I wrote what I knew at the time, well before I know how to properly research a project. I wrote the entire thing by the seat of my pants and was often fueled by a sugar high of my mom's latest baked good. But, like the baked good, I held fast to the idea that if I had a good, solid idea for a story, a good first draft would follow. I've since completely renovated, edited, and re- edited my first manuscript into a polished piece ready for agent queries, but it's a good reminder that you have to start somewhere. Go call your mom and ask about her favorite recipe. Katherine Arkady *Name still under reconsideration for the nth time

The federal government of the United States of America should make it mandatory that every citizen works at least a year in the retail industry. The general public needs to be aware of the abuse and neglect that these employees experience. Not necessarily from their employer but, more often than not, from the customers they're supposed to serve. I have a collected history of four years in retail. That's nothing compared to some veterans, but plenty of time to know to say please and thank you to the retail workers I interact with. Of the four retail jobs I had, two of them were keyholders for clothing stores. One was a trendy store for contemporary women's fashions and the other was an upscale clothing store for women "of a certain age." I was 18 and 20 at the times of working at these establishments. While I was too young to drink, I was not too young to be verbally abused by entitled women and, occasionally, their husbands. A husband once argued that a blouse that had been washed and ripped in the wash was just like an iPhone with a camera that had broken and needed to be replaced in kind. I said my hands were tied. He called the customer service number and berated the employee on the phone until they gave me the go-ahead to honor their return. That's a lot of what happened. The unhappy customers wore us down so often that policy meant nothing. They won because they acted out and we were forced to smile and say thank you at the end of their transactions. Maybe I was disassociating, but the day a worn and washed bralette was thrown at me because I wouldn't honor an out of date return policy, a character--Mallory--was born. I needed a healthy avenue to handle this customer's angry words being spit in my direction because she lost out on a $12.99 purchase. She wouldn't leave until I gave her my full name. I gave her a fake name and she could tell. She yelled about it until another customer asked her to relax. The angry woman left in a huff and the customer who saved me got 10% off. I decided that Mallory would be the type to tell off a customer and not care if she was reprimanded by her manager. It got to the point where I gave people 10% off if they were nice. My manager didn't like that because the district manager above her was noticing a drop in sales. I guess if you're not getting it from below, you're getting it from above. But there were perks. I got a 50% discount on all the clothes and first dibs on things that were going on sale. My coworkers were lovely women. I was able to overhear customers "of a certain age" talking about upcoming events. I was able to learn about a charity event and that helped me attend and meet some guys. Mallory benefitted from it as well for her storyline about snagging men "of a certain wallet size." When working at the trendy shop, I got asked out by the cute Fed-Ex guy that delivered clothes on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. He asked me out on a Friday, we had a date on Saturday where I found out he was 12 years older than me and way too grabby for a first date. I coped with this by wondering "What Would Mallory Do?" I built up the courage to be ready to tell him off on Monday if he had a problem with it. Monday rolled around and a new Fed-Ex guy was on our delivery route. At least Mallory got some writing material. By the time I was finishing up a storyline for Mallory, it was also time for me to leave the second clothing store. I was hired into my next job: a home healthcare recruiter. Mallory's time in my mind had also taken a backseat. While I try to block out the memories of my retail experience, the existence of Mallory will stick with me for a while. If you want to know more about Mallory, she exists in my first novel. Until then, be nice to retail employees, Katherine Arkady